I still remember the tug in my heart the first day I left my baby to go back to work. Maternity leave for me was 4 weeks, that was it. My practice was already 4 years old and I had an associate, so it did run without me being there, but I still felt that I needed to be present asap. I had my manager bring me work to my office, whatever I could do from home, I did. I ignored the “sleep while the baby sleeps” recommendations and worked while sleeping very little. I think many of you can resonate!
As dentists, we’re trained to value precision, control, and outcomes. In the operatory, we can shape and polish until something is just right. Afterall, we are in the mm profession! But motherhood? That’s a different story. It’s unpredictable, beautiful, and often messy—especially when you’re a new mom trying to balance it all.
There were days I stood chairside, mentally calculating feeding times and wondering if my baby was napping or crying. I would check my baby monitor on my phone constantly. The guilt of not being there during those small everyday moments felt heavy. I started to resent my caregivers because my child would hurtfully prefer her over me. I missed the first roll over, the first word, the first step, and it bothered me so much. But I’ve learned—over time and with grace, that you have to give yourself grace and—that you don’t have to do it alone. In fact, you shouldn’t.
One of the best decisions I made was hiring a night nurse. While it felt indulgent at the time, it allowed me to rest, heal, and function. I wasn’t dragging myself into the clinic, exhausted and foggy. I could show up rested—for my patients, my team, and most importantly, my child. The moms of my pediatric patients all strongly recommended I hire one, especially because I was working full-time. And boy, I am so glad I did.
I also brought in household help. It was hard at first—I had to let go of the idea that I should do everything myself. But just like in your dental practice, you need a trusted team at home. You don’t scale a business by being the receptionist, the assistant, and the doctor. So why try to do it all at home?
What I wish I knew then was this:
- Spending money on household support is not a luxury — it’s a lifeline.
- Being well-rested is productive.
- Delegating gives you time to focus on the things only you can do — like showing up emotionally for your kids, your team, and yourself.
Stress in our personal lives doesn’t stay at the door when we enter the office. It follows us. It clouds our judgment, our patience, our happiness. That’s why it’s essential to reduce it wherever we can—at work and at home.
Motherhood and dentistry are both full-time jobs. But if there’s one thing I want every new dentist mom to know, it’s this:
- You are not failing by asking for help.
- You are building a life where both your child and your career can thrive.
- And the happiness of a mother directly impacts the health and success of her child.
Give yourself permission to build systems that serve you—professionally and personally. You deserve sleep, peace, and time to breathe. You deserve to feel joy in both your scrubs and your pajamas. And above all, you deserve to know that you’re doing enough. Because you are.
